Golden Sunrise Everyone!
I have a 2.4 year old daughter and she is very much attached to me to the point that she does not go and play with anyone else, even my husband and my mother. If they try to even talk to her, she starts crying and starts pulling my dress to pick her up.
If I go out of her sight for even a few seconds, she comes running to me. We have kept our TV (we only show her nursery rhymes for a couple of hours everyday), in the dining room which is attached to the kitchen. If she is watching some nursery rhymes and I go to kitchen even for a few minutes, she will come running to me.
If I make her sit on the potty seat in the washroom and go out to get fresh clothes, telling her very clearly that I will be back in a minute, she starts crying saying Mamma come back.. Mamma will come back.. I want Mamma.
I am able to manage her behavior and am completely by her side 24×7, playing with her and taking care of her, only because I am staying at my mom's house, have left my job and am with my daughter completely and we have a maid at my mom's house to do house work. My husband has a very hectic job and travels a lot and gets to spend very precious couple of hours in the entire week with us. So he is okay with however things are going on now.
My mom and I have tried multiple times to wean my daughter off me and to make her spend time with my mom alone (atleast half an hour everyday) with me not being around. But, all those attempts have been an utter failure and she starts crying as soon as I go out of sight.
Couple of months back, we had tried sending her to a playschool for a couple of hours just so that she spends time away from me for a while. But that was an utter nightmare. My daughter went into an utter shock, stopped talking to everyone including me and just kept on uncontrollably crying all day and night long. We stopped sending her after 5 days and it took me almost a month (that too with the help of my VK) to bring her back to regular behavior. I shudder to think what would have happened if I did not have my VK.
I am still nursing her to sleep (day nap and night sleep) and how much ever I try, she is just not getting weaned. Also, she wakes up multiple times at night crying out for me even though i am sleeping right next to her.
I have started working with my VK to get her to sleep through the night and also to stop nursing to sleep. It's still a work in progress. I hope it works out and I can post these as success stories on the forum.
On the forum, i read the idea of 'creation of a pink womb with safety and security and placing child in it'. I did this for almost a month (placing direct request twice a day). I could only see a small amount of difference with this. Now, she spends like few minutes playing with my mom or husband, but I have to be in sight. If I go to the other room, she will immediately stop playing and come running to me.
My husband and i are frankly fine with this behavior, since we feel that she will grow out of it as she grows up and i am able to teach her good mannerisms and other things which she would never else pick up in playschool. We have seen a couple of other kids as well (kids of cousins and friends) with similar behavior. But rest everyone around us feels that if we let this behaviour continue, she will only end up being more attached to me. It was my husband's and my decision to stop sending her to playschool. Rest everyone in our family and friends insisted that we keep sending her and that she will grow into it.
We are only worried on how to prepare to send her to pre kg after she turns 3 years old. At that time, we would have no option but to send her since that is when formal schooling will begin. Also, once her formal education begins, I want to start working again.
Also, since a couple of weeks, I have noticed that her behavior is becoming more extreme and this behaviour of hers is becoming slightly unbearable. She does not allow me to eat food sometimes. She will come and sit on my lap and tell me - Pick me up pick me up. Also, i have every day been taking her to parks, ever since she was 8 months old. Other then rainy days or some off days, even though she would not be ready to go, I have been able to convince her and take her. But, since the last 2 weeks, other than a couple of days, she just did not agree to go to park. If I force her to come, she starts crying.
Also to add, my daughter is not timid. So i have not actually given her Bravo serum. She is actually the opposite. She will climb things and jump from beds and chairs. She always loves to try new things (games, food, visiting places etc.) and she is not scared of talking to people. I have taught her how to talk cordially and sometimes without me prompting, she will talk to kids or elders in the park or on the road or even try to hug them. I think she deliberately does not talk to my mom or anyone in the family because she knows that there is a chance that I may leave her with them and go off somewhere. She knows I will not leave her with anyone else for even a second.
The reason I wrote this long back ground story is to request for advice on, if any of the below mentioned 2 remedies from the VK forum may be of help in this situation:
Cord cutting with the help of VK
Healing Karmic Relationships with VK
Towards the end of the cord cutting thread, there is a brilliant post by Sriya explaining how this can beautify relationship between people. I was thinking this may be the best remedy for me since there may be some past life cords between us which is making her behave like this.
But I wanted to know if it will be safe to do cord cutting with my own daughter, that too a 2.4 year old kid. I don't want to emotionally or in any manner harm her and that is why I am taking pains to do this weaning off in the most gentle manner. I just want her to be independent and happy with other people as well and want to stop her from being a mom chipku.
Other than the above 2 remedies, if there is anything else anyone can suggest, I would be very happy to try that as well
Many many thanks!